Stress happens along a spectrum. There is positive stress in our lives like starting a new job. The next category is tolerable stress, and that can be falling and spraining your ankle. With a little bit of support and time you get over it. But then comes toxic stress. Toxic stress can happen with prolonged, severe or repeated exposure to adversity or uncertainty. Trauma is the impact that toxic stress leaves behind, and right now, the world seems to be full of sources of pretty toxic stress.
Fortunately, human lives are built with the capacity to not only to heal ourselves but to participate in the healing of others. One approach to use if you encounter someone experiencing extreme stress is Dr. Bruce Perry’s “3R’s” — Regulate, Relate, Reason.
Regulate by taking a deep breath and grounding yourself.
Relate by showing empathy and compassion.
Reason by moving into a more logical conversation and accessing that higher level of thinking.
This is a relatively simple approach, yet it is very effective in lowering the temperature and giving people a feeling of control.
This has been and is a tough time for all of us, and we don’t know what the next few months will bring. With that said, it’s heartening to know that there are mechanisms in place to deal with the uncertainties.
Courtesy of Sadie Elisseou, MD, Trauma-Informed Solutions Expert